


The Courage of A Moment

by Talvenhenki



Category: Star Trek, Star Trek: Picard
Genre: Agnebal fluff, Angst, Cris is not ok, Fluff, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Panic Attacks, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Shameless fluff in chapter 2
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-17
Updated: 2020-02-20
Packaged: 2021-02-27 21:47:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,620
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22772776
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Talvenhenki/pseuds/Talvenhenki
Summary: Picard was about to thank Captain Rios and say that no, he really didn’t need to worry about Picard, but when he looked up at Rios’ eyes, his own blood ran cold. Rios’ eyes were wide and the hand he’d reached out was shaking. He had stopped at the middle of kneeling down and he couldn’t tear his eyes away from the wall – the bulkhead – Picard had hit his head on.An accident that leaves a bloodstain on a bulkhead completely changes the course of one day.
Relationships: Agnes Jurati & Cristóbal Rios
Comments: 24
Kudos: 61





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I had a cruel idea and decided to write this (also known as a situation called "here goes Orion again")
> 
> I hope you enjoy this rather miserable story!

Captain Cristóbal Rios was one of those people who tried very hard to maintain the look that he hated the Starfleet with burning passion, but secretly couldn’t stop working according to the Starfleet regulation. Jean-Luc Picard had noticed it already during his first visit aboard _La Sirena_ and he still couldn’t stop noticing it. He wished he knew what had made Captain Rios hate Starfleet so much, not because he wanted to fix the captain, but because he wanted to treat the captain better than his life had done. It was clearly something traumatic, judging by the way Captain Rios acted in general.

They were updating each other – well, mostly it was Rios who was updating the others – on their flight situation and how long it would take to reach their next stop when the ship suddenly lurched. Picard lost his footing and crashed into the wall behind him, hitting his head.

“Admiral Picard!” Rios called, rushing to help the admiral who had fallen onto the ground.

Picard was about to thank Captain Rios and say that no, he really didn’t need to worry about Picard, but when he looked up at Rios’ eyes, his own blood ran cold. Rios’ eyes were wide and the hand he’d reached out was shaking. He had stopped at the middle of kneeling down and he couldn’t tear his eyes away from the wall – the bulkhead – Picard had hit his head on.

“ _Sangre…_ ” Rios whispered. His breathing sped up as he straightened himself, backing away a few steps. “ _No. No, no, no!_ ”

Captain Rios was speaking in his native Spanish. That couldn’t be a good sign. Picard got back on his feet and tried to approach the captain, perhaps to calm him, but he flinched and backed away until his back was against his own captain’s chair. He was shaking all over and he was terrifyingly pale.

“Cristóbal?” Agnes asked, trying to grab his hand, only to find hers being gently pushed away by the captain. “What’s going on?”

The captain was hugging himself, his figure slightly bowed forward, and breathing raggedly. He was trembling and his eyes weren’t focused at anything. He clasped his hand over his mouth as a panicked sound escaped his throat.

The EMH chose that moment to materialise next to the hyperventilating captain. Assessing the situation, he mumbled, “oh dear”, and gently guided the captain to sit down on his chair before he could pass out from the lack of oxygen. The hologram knelt next to Captain Rios, who was still shaking, and began to talk to him in Spanish. His speech was soft, but anyone could tell that he wasn’t very skilled at speaking Spanish.

“Could you move away?” the hologram asked after noticing the others were still there. “The captain needs some space and privacy right now. And Miss Musiker, please perform a full scan on the admiral to make sure he’s fine too.”

Raffi sighed and grabbed a scanner and a dermal regenerator before leading Admiral Picard away from the bridge. Agnes and Elnor followed them, both looking equally worried, and a little bit heartbroken too.

“The captain’s mind needs medical attention”, Elnor said quietly, stating the obvious, when they were far enough for Captain Rios to hear, but close enough to see and hear what happened at the bridge. “The hologram cannot be enough for him, no matter how much it tries.”

Agnes nodded, staying quiet. She noticed the Hospitality Hologram cleaning the wall where the admiral had hit his head and winced. Meanwhile, Raffi was fixing the wound at the back of Admiral Picard’s head.

“For God’s sake, JL, sit still!” she muttered. She was agitated too, never having seen Captain Rios react to anything like that. “Just let me fix your head, please! I don’t know what made Chris react like that, but it clearly has something to do with that head wound of yours. Just please, let me fix that wound.”

Agnes had crouched down into a little ball, hugging herself, and Elnor sat down next to her. Both of them looked uncomfortable every time they heard muffled cries coming from the direction of the bridge and the soft sounds of the emergency hologram who tried to calm their captain. Agnes especially looked like she was ready to cry at any moment.

“There has to be something we can do to help Cristóbal”, Agnes muttered. “I can’t stand seeing him like this!”

“He would have asked for our help if he wanted that”, Elnor said, looking rather melancholy. “I believe the captain thinks asking for help is a sign of weakness he doesn’t wish to show.”

“That’s stupid! Cristóbal isn’t weak at all so why does he act so stupid?” Tears were streaming down Agnes’ cheeks and she tried to wipe them away furiously. “He would so readily help others – he’s already helping us – but he won’t accept our help!”

Raffi sighed and sat down next to Agnes, patting her back. “That’s just how he is, and, for the record, how I am as well. We’re a pair of lone wolves who don’t know how to accept the help we need. And we seem to not trust the world overly much.”

Agnes frowned and hid her face behind her knees. She twitched when she heard another muffled cry and a litany of _shh_ _, mi capitán, no estamos allá, respire, por favor, respire, mi capitán_. She just wanted to cry, hearing the distress Cristóbal was in.

Admiral Picard watched the trio sitting next to each other, listening to Captain Rios’ distress. Raffi looked sad and very, very tired, and she tried to comfort Agnes who was crying. Elnor looked vaguely confused – he probably couldn’t understand what could cause such a reaction on a man, or what could break a man in the way Captain Rios had been – and he tried to comfort Agnes as well.

He felt very proud of the crew he had chosen, no matter how ragtag it seemed to the others. Even Raffi, who’d initially declined to help Picard and had been wary of Agnes, had become fast friends with the others.

Eventually, after half an hour, Captain Rios seemed to calm down enough for the medical hologram to be satisfied. The hologram left Captain Rios in his chair and approached the others, looking thoroughly exhausted.

“I had to give him a mild sedative”, the hologram said, “he wouldn’t calm down otherwise.”

“What happened to him?” Agnes asked.

The hologram looked alarmed, quickly looking at Captain Rios’ direction, and then back to Agnes. “His previous captain died in a horrible way. I cannot give out the details, as I don’t know them myself, but it involved a head trauma and blood splattered all over a bulkhead. Your injury might have triggered him, Admiral.”

Picard winced and Raffi covered her mouth with her free hand – Agnes had grabbed the other for comfort. Elnor looked visibly shocked, having been unable to imagine such a terrible way to die.

“What can we do to make him feel better?” Picard asked.

“Act like everything’s normal, like he’s just tired”, the hologram said, probably missing the point. “Or, perhaps not. I have no idea, to be honest. Just…be kind to him, please? Understand that he’s been hurt in the most horrible ways, but doesn’t want to be fixed, not by anything in my power, anyway. Let him keep up that horrible façade he’s built until one of you can pierce through it.”

Agnes nodded and rushed back to the bridge. She pulled one of those big toolboxes next to the captain’s chair and sat on it, looking at Captain Rios. The others returned as well, and Raffi checked the navigational stats before returning the ship to the autopilot system once more.

“Do you need anything, Chris?” she asked softly. Captain Rios shook his head, looking somewhere to his left. He looked tired, so very tired, that it seemed like a miracle that he didn’t fall asleep right then and there.

Agnes grabbed Cristóbal’s left hand, rubbing warmth into it. A look of terrible sadness passed on Captain Rios’ eyes just for a moment, and he squeezed Agnes’ fingers gently. He looked into Agnes’ eyes and with his lips, formed the words “thank you”, not having the energy to use his voice.

“We’ll be here if you need us, Cristóbal”, Agnes whispered, pressing Cristóbal’s knuckles against her cheek.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wanted to add some fluff to this so here you go, Agnes Jurati is a destructive force on her way to Cristóbal's heart and she'll stop at nothing.

“You look like you’re going to doze off any minute now, Chris”, Raffi said, “shouldn’t you be resting in your room?”

It was hours later, and the mild sedative given by the EMH still hadn’t worn off. Agnes was still sitting next to Cristóbal, holding his hand, while Cristóbal was nodding off. They had been flying on autopilot for a while, slowed down a few warp fractions, seeing as Cristóbal wasn’t quite up to piloting the ship while sedated. Agnes hadn’t left his side even for a moment. She had been too shaken to do so, still trembling from the force of Cristóbal’s panic attack.

“Can’t move”, Cristóbal mumbled. Even his voice sounded exhausted. “Beam me?”

Raffi looked worried. “I’ve got to beam you in the middle of the room; I can’t beam you on a chair or on your bed. I shouldn’t beam you if you can’t even make it somewhere more comfortable after I’ve beamed you.”

“Beam me with him”, Agnes said, “I’ll help.”

Cristóbal nodded, squeezing Agnes’ fingers again. Raffi shook her head but did as asked anyway, beaming the two in Cristóbal’s quarters. She made sure to beam them between the bed and the armchairs, hoping that they, or at least Cristóbal, would be able to get some rest. They landed on the floor, more sitting than standing, as Cristóbal leaned heavily on Agnes.

“Here we are”, Agnes muttered, “let’s get you up.”

Agnes somehow managed to push Cristóbal up (“ _Use your legs, Agnes, lift things using your legs_ ”, her father had once said) and into a position where he could somehow walk. Dear God, Agnes had never realised how heavy human beings were. Cristóbal was a tall man and, being as he was, he couldn’t use his legs very well at that moment, so it was up to Agnes to get him onto the bed. She managed it, somehow, letting Cristóbal collapse onto the large bed.

“Remind me to never carry you again”, Agnes said, trying to catch her breath as Cristóbal turned onto his back. She got up and removed Cristóbal’s shoes so he could rest his feet on the bed.

“I’ll keep that in mind”, Cristóbal mumbled. “Stay for a bit?” he asked weakly when Agnes was about to leave.

Agnes knelt down next to the bed to be on Cristóbal’s eye level. He still looked exhausted to the core as he gazed at Agnes, deep into her eyes. He offered her his hand, and she took it, trying to convey to him how she worried and cared for him.

“You really should sleep”, Agnes whispered, “I’ll stay here with you.”

Cristóbal nodded, closing his eyes. He held Agnes’ hand with both of his own, perhaps using her as a lifeline that would anchor him in the present. Agnes used her free hand to brush some of Cristóbal’s hair behind his ear. Then she brushed her fingers against his cheek.

“That feels nice”, Cristóbal breathed. Agnes blushed, realising what she’d done.

“Sleep”, Agnes said, “you really need to rest.”

It didn’t take long for Cristóbal to drift off to sleep. He was a surprisingly quiet sleeper, not moving an inch and barely making a sound. Somehow Agnes had expected him to snore, or at least to turn around a little bit. But no, he only looked more peaceful than Agnes could ever have imagined him to look. Oh, how haunted must he have been for Agnes to think that looking peaceful was impossible for him?

“You deserve so much better than what you got from life”, Agnes whispered, mostly to herself. She leaned her chin on the bed and began stroking Cristóbal’s shoulder just to have something to do.

Soon Agnes realised she was also terribly tired. It wouldn’t hurt to sleep a bit while Cristóbal was resting, so she closed her eyes and fell asleep soon after.

* * *

Cristóbal’s eyes flew open. He was in his room. Why on Earth was he in his room? He had been on the bridge, briefing the others, the ship had swayed and the admiral… Oh. So _that_ had happened. He had lost himself into the memories, more than ever. His nightmares never gave him panic attacks like that and the EMH could always guide him out of them.

Cristóbal’s eyes wandered to Agnes’ sleeping face. Something, almost like warmth, filled his heart when Cristóbal realised that Agnes hadn’t left him. She’d stayed, kneeling on the cold ship floor. Oh shit, Agnes was kneeling on the cold ship floor!

“Activate the, uh… activate Mr. Hospitality.”

The hospitality hologram – who was a real pain – materialised next to the bed, looking rather confused. He looked around, spotted Cristóbal, and his eyes widened. For a moment, neither said anything.

“I need your help”, Cristóbal said, growing exasperated. “You need to lift Agnes on the bed. She’s probably freezing on that floor. Hurry _up_ or I’ll call Emmett or someone else to do it!”

Mr. Hospitality got to work at an incredible speed, knowing how Cristóbal hated him. It. Whatever. Cristóbal only called Emmett “him”; everyone else was an “it”. They were just copies whose existence annoyed Cristóbal more than anything.

When Agnes was safely on the bed, Mr. Hospitality deactivated himself in a flash. Cristóbal pulled the blanket to cover her so she wouldn’t freeze – Cristóbal would hate to see the small doctor freezing and catching a chill because of him.

“There you go”, Cristóbal whispered, “now you should be comfortable.”

Cristóbal stayed next to Agnes, still holding her hand. He watched her sleeping face and found himself smiling at her – actually smiling! He had no memory of when he had actually smiled aside from that sarcastic expression he so often wore. He brushed her cheek with his thumb, marvelling at the softness of her skin. She was beautiful like a porcelain doll.

After a while of sleeping, Agnes’ eyes opened, and she looked confusedly at Cristóbal. She then looked ahead, even more confused and moved her gaze back at Cristóbal who was smiling lopsidedly at her.

“…My knees hurt”, was the first thing she said. “And I think I fell asleep on the floor so how am I on the bed?”

“Mr. Hospitality helped”, Cristóbal explained. He then looked away from Agnes, almost ashamed. “Thank you. For not leaving.”

Agnes reacted with more force than Cristóbal had anticipated and hugged him with a force Cristóbal couldn’t believe she could possess. She was tiny and yet, even if Cristóbal had tried, he wouldn’t be able to wriggle away from her crushing embrace. So, instead, he decided to return it. It was the first hug he’d had in years, also probably the first time he’d been touched gently for such a long time. He leaned his forehead on Agnes’ shoulder, drawing strength from the touch.

“You are marvellous, did you know that?” he asked.

“Oh no, I’m not”, Agnes said, burying one of her hands in Cristóbal’s hair. “I’m just a fool who cares too much and tries to heal everyone and everything. And who likes hugs and will inflict them on everyone that comes too close. You’ve been caught, Cristóbal Rios, and I’m not letting you go anytime soon.”

Cristóbal let out a soft huff of laughter and pulled Agnes closer. Yes, she was definitely a keeper.

**Author's Note:**

> Spanish key:  
> Sangre = blood  
> mi capitán, no estamos allá, respire, por favor, respire, mi capitán = my captain, we are not there, breathe, please breathe, my captain (formal 'you')
> 
> Comments fuel me and my writing!!


End file.
